I wish I could feel hate
hate is pure
white hot
burns so hard then finally smolders to embers
but grief
grief is lingering
it leaves you in a state
a state of apathy
stillness
as if all life has ended
yet still you wake
each morning
reach across the sheets
and find
space
I would hate you
so I can move on
and live the life I had… before
your love came and blew it all away
but I still love
and that is my debt to my heart
and my penance to my soul
my grief