The Glass Elevator

"Chelsea tries to resist the charms of Jeremy, her jackass co-worker."

I had to shake my head as Jeremy Pax came into the teachers’ lounge. I was under the impression that the new person always has to earn their place — you know, serve their time before they were accepted among...

The Salutatorian

"When a smart girl turns slutty . . ."

My friends had asked, how was it so, that I had passedFrom steadfast salutatorian to beingSuch a promiscuous slut(a redundancy of sorts, but not their words).But I answered so disingenuouslyAnd with so politely maintained a pretenseOf taking no offense at...

Wild Christmas (in June)

"The best time for love is six months away!"

I’m a winter girl, I cannot lie(I could give you 13 reasons why).If this were the Christmas season, what a jolly apparitionYou’d find me to be in my yuletide condition:Cropped and tight in a warm ribbed sweater,I might even break...

Grad School Mixer

"Looking across the room to attract a new mate"

Pleather pantsSeldom ride on the assesOf girls who wear glassesButI’m the proud exception to many a rule.Life’s full of surprisesLike a bad burritoThe Oort CloudOr an offshore bank accountAnd I’m just one of them.You seem to me to be searchingSearching...