"Sometimes the gander needs a lesson on what the goose doesn’t like."
Have some mercy on a guy. I mean, it's bad enough you have those big tits, but where did you find that t-shirt, in the box with your old junior high stuff? Half your tits are popping out of the scoop...
"Twin brothers, Peter and Paul, secretly double-team Joy, a grateful bit-o-honey."
Paul Marrs walked through the door to the apartment he shared with his identical twin brother, Peter. “Hey, Bro,” he called out as he put down his briefcase and went to the fridge for a cold beer.Peter yelled back, “Hey,...
"When cooking gets sexy...."
Caller: “Hello?”119 Operator: “Hello! Happy holidays and thank you for choosing Butterball Turkey! What’s your emergency?”Caller: “Why would you think there’s an emergency?”Operator: “It’s Christmas Eve, sir. Why else would you be calling a turkey company?”Caller: “Well, you’re so right,...
"Continued, erotic adventures of Peen"
Peen stared at the large sign above the entrance to the swimming pool. It stated emphatically in bold red letters "Adult Members Only. Open at 10:00 O'clock." He checked the time and grinned noting it was just 9:30. He gave a flick of his...
"A ship of fools. You must decide who was the biggest fool. Hopefully not the Author."
My name is Gillian. I am the captain of a yacht called the Squirter. I am not your typical crusty ole ship captain. Most men and some women find me attractive if I may be so bold. I am blonde,...
"With apologies to Edgar Allen Poe"
Once upon a midnight beery, while I stressed out, drunk and weary, In my one-room flat so dreary, a floor above a liquor store.As I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,As if someone was gently rapping, rapping on my...
“So the farmer’s kid comes running back home from Maisy’s Whore House, waving the duck his dad had given him to pay for his shot. His father asks him, ‘So, how’d you get on with Maisy, son?’“And the boy starts...
"An epic tale of adventure, fucking, and a naughty princess…"
Once upon a time there was a beautiful young woman named Bellezza, but everyone who knew her called her Elle. She was a princess who lived alone in a castle in an enchanted forest with only her horse. She was...
"A cash-strapped woman seeks financial salvation. At a porn audition"
(Foreigner's 'Cold as Ice' plays over opening credits and voiceover)Living in Houston I was accustomed to miserable heat and humidity but I was, like every other Houstonian, very unaccustomed to our current plight of bitter cold. My power was off...
"This shouldn't be too difficult."
The laptop screen showed the following: Solve the following and win a prize: Lana "lost" a giggle wood. Or … Send in a story about your most unique sexual encounters and win a prize."Do you wanna enter?" Darius, eager and...
