The Strangler Fig Pas de Deux

"“My poor body, madam, requires it: I am driven on by the flesh; and he must needs go that the devil drives.” Shakespeare, All's Well that Ends Well."

The whirring fan was a triumph of optimism over effectiveness, not a skerrick of breeze cut through the treacly mugginess shrouding my skin. That humidity, redolent of molasses, mango, and frangipani, continually asked: Always the outsider in this fugging hell...

Spellbound: Peek-a-Boo

"What angel wakes me from my flow’ry bed? Titania"

Never look back; that's your mantra. It helped loosen the knots binding me to parental beliefs. But, now; fuck you, it's never, ‘just sex.’So it’s a spiteful last longing look over my shoulder, before vanishing into the woods. Lot’s wife glanced...

Finding Flora

"“Water is the mother of the vine, the nurse and fountain of fecundity, the adorner and refresher of the world.” – Charles Mackay"

An act of sporting heroism made for the best day ever. An act of spineless weakness made for the worst day ever.For Jack, his dual-sport motorbike aggressively bouncing over the ruts of an abandoned forestry track deep in the Blue...

Mrs. Claus, Keynote Speaker

"Evelyn Claus rings in the New Year in the company of lovely women."

“Oh, Nicholas, you look exhausted this year.”“It’s a labour of love, my dear.”Mrs. Claus rubbed her husband’s knotted shoulders. “Shall we raise your North Pole?” she asked, leaning in to nibble on his earlobe.“You should pack, love. The Arctic and...

The table wobbled sloshing beer from Metallica-T-shirt-guy’s pint onto the cluttered wooden surface. He didn’t care. Grunting, he juddered, face contorted into the strangest grimace like a clown stung by a wasp. He groaned, tensed, then exhaled loudly. The table...