The Royal Morning Thing

"Shamelessly stolen from A.A. Milne"

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The King asked
The Queen, and
The Queen asked
The Dairymaid:
“Could we have some butter for
The Royal morning thing?”
The Queen asked the Dairymaid,
The Dairymaid
Said, “Certainly,
I’ll go and tell the cow
Now
To make butter for the King.”

The Dairymaid
She curtsied,
And went and told
The Royal Cow:
“Get slice of creamy butter for
The Royal morning thing.”
The Royal Cow
Said sleepily:
“You’d better hint
Her Majesty
Of hornless using marmalade
To give their thing
Some zing.”

The Dairymaid
Said, “Fuck me!”
And went to
Her Majesty.
She curtsied to the Queen, and
Let her eyes to swing:
“Excuse me,
Your Majesty,
For taking of
The liberty,
But marmalade works magic, when
It’s under
Your
G-string.”

The Queen said
“Fuck me!:
And went to
His Majesty:
”Talking of the butter for
The Royal morning thing,
Cool people
Think that
Marmalade
Is sexier.
Won’t you lick some marmalade
I smeared on
My thing?”

The King cried,
“Bullshit!”
And then he yelled,
“Oh, fuck my dick!”
The King moaned,
“Oh, lick my balls!”
And turned away in bed.
“Nobody,”
He whimpered,
“Could call me
A kinky man;
I only asked
That butter
For you and me
They bring!”

The Queen said,
“There, there!”
And went to
The Dairymaid.
The Dairymaid
Said, “There, there!”
And went to the shed.
The cow said,
“There, there!
I didn’t really
Mean it;
If that’s what hornless are horny for,
Here’s butter for their thing.”

The Queen took
The butter
And brought it to
His Majesty;
The King said,
“Butter, eh?”
And grabbed her Royal butt.
“Nobody,” he said,
As he fondled her
Eagerly,
“Nobody,” he said,
As he slid down her knickers,
“Nobody,
My queenie whore,
Could call me
A kinky man –
BUT
We do need a little bit of butter for our thing!”

Published 3 years ago

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