Once upon a night of thunder,
While I shook my head in wonder,
At the latest round of incest tales and the smut we all adore.
Suddenly, a slight vibration
(Almost like wand masturbation)
Announced a whatsapp message from an ex of long before.
Eagerly, I read the missive,
Which wondered if I felt permissive,
On this wild and windy evening, did my body feel in need?
Well, my husband was off earning,
So to satisfy my yearning,
I texted back “Ok” and to this outrage I agreed.
In no time my beau was knocking,
But before the bed was rocking,
I noticed that he carried something I’d not seen before.
A birdcage was uncovered,
And I saw my former lover,
Had brought a gorgeous parrot from the nearby pet bird store.
From our naughty bedroom action,
This was quite a big distraction.
For never had such a lovely creature entered through my door.
His plumage was a glory,
Of bright colours. What strange story,
Had brought this stunning beauty from his homeland to my door?
But when we had admired,
His fine feathers we retired,
To the bedroom and our clothes were soon discarded on the floor.
To prepare me for a dicking,
He first began by licking,
And my body was aroused as it had never been before.
He was a skillful oral giver.
My knees, he made them quiver,
And the only words there spoken were me crying out for more.
My clitoris was suckled,
And my knees, they would have buckled.
It felt so good, I couldn’t hold my tongue a second more.
As his penis penetrated,
My vagina, how I hated,
The gnawing sense of guilt that I was feeling in my chest.
But his thrusts, his touch and guile,
Made me forget myself a while.
I closed my eyes and held him tight and let nature do the rest.
I wrapped my legs around him.
Sweat was breaking out on each limb,
And our bodies were united as they had been long before.
I thought he could go no deeper,
And the overhanging keeper
Of our dreams shook on its hook as we shook my bed to its core.
As we achieved orgasm,
My i-phone gave a spasm.
It was sending me a warning that my husband would return!
My ex-lover fled in panic,
His escape was truly manic,
And barely seven minutes later, I heard the front door turn.
“I’m sorry to surprise you,
And I don’t mean to chastise you,
But I cannot help but wonder why a parrot lives here now?
For I’m sure we had agreed,
That the cost in bones or seed,
Had led us to forgo pets? I should not enjoy a row?”
“Fuck me harder!” cried the bird,
“Oh, I’m coming, fuck,” he purred,
“Fuck, my weak and boring husband isn’t half as good as you!”
Alas, I was defeated,
By a parrot who repeated,
Words I never should have spoken and which turned the air quite blue.
