Chapter 13…
The Present…
I was in the hallway when Danny came running out of the suite. “Olivia, please wait…”
“Piss off,” I answered without turning or stopping my trek towards the elevators.
Calling out my name again, Danny ran to get in front of me, stopping my progress towards the elevators. I moved left, he moved. I moved right… I had the choice of continuing this idiotic dance or running over him.
“Olivia, please! Olivia, come back to the room so we can talk…”
“Talk about what, Danny,” I interrupted to ask. “You said everything that needs to be said.”
“But I didn’t mean any of it that way!”
“What way? Oh, wait… Do you mean the way that I’m only here because I want something from you? Or do you mean the way you called me a whore who is using her ass to get that something?”
“No! Olivia, I never meant to even imply that…”
“Oh, you did more than imply, Danny! You can’t even accept that I’m here doing you a favor simply because I wanted to. No, you think I’m only here because I want something from you. Well, guess what! Friends do favors for friends and I thought we had at least a chance to be friends.”
“We are friends…” Danny said before I cut him off.
“No, we’re not! I thought we might be but you think of me as just another girl who wants something from you. I get it! I do! Carolyn screwed you over. Well, guess what, Danny? People get screwed over every day! They live through it. They learn from it. They get over it and move on. But, not you!
“Jesus, Danny, it’s been three years since you graduated high school and look at you… You’re still just as fucked up as you were back then. You had to ask me to be a fake girlfriend because you’re too scared to actually ask a girl out. In your fucked up mind, any girl who might be interested in you, you automatically wonder what she wants from you.”
“But, you do want something and you won’t say what,” Danny replied in a weak defense.
“Yeah, I do, or at least I did! But did I keep it a secret that I wanted you to do something? Hell, the only reason I didn’t tell you what I wanted is because you were so damned wrapped up in your exams! You wanted me to leave me alone until after your exams… I did! I said I’d wait until after your exams were over so you could concentrate on them. I did! I said I’d wait until your sister’s wedding is over and we’re back in the city. I was!” I gotta admit I was worked up to a fever pitch and on a roll, as I got louder the longer I continued until I was poling my finger into Danny’s chest and shouting in his face. “Yea, Danny! I wanted to ask you for a fucking favor! But, did that bitch Carolyn rob you of your Goddamned Free Will?! Are you incapable of saying, ‘No’?!”
Danny stood motionless without a reply.
“That’s right, you fucking asshole,” I continued in a slightly lower voice, driving the point home and sweeping my arm in a long, slow, dramatic gesture. “I did alll of this… Letting your study buddies and family think I was your girlfriend… Bringing you food… Coming to your sister’s wedding… Kicking Carolyn’s ass… Getting chicken and cow shit on… My… SHOES!! I did all of this without knowing if you’d even say, ‘Yes’!
“I did all of this because I wanted to. I did all of this because I thought you might be a friend I could help out and because it would be fun! But in your fucked up brain? I must be a whore doing all of this just to get something from you.
“Well, guess what, Danny! I am a whore! Yeah, that’s right. Your fake fiancé is a real whore! I sell my ass for money… But, I don’t use sex to ask for a favor from someone who might have been a friend!”
“You can’t be a…”
“What’s the matter, Danny? Can’t say ‘whore’? Then try ‘Call Girl’ instead. It’s more descriptive of what I am. Men call and I go fuck ’em. Now, instead of wondering what I wanted while we were having sex, you can wonder how much I’ll charge you. Well, don’t! On your best day, you couldn’t afford me. I might be the highest-priced piece of ass in the city.”
I felt empty. I wasn’t angry or hurt anymore… I just felt empty. I’d said and admitted to more than I’d meant to. Well, fuck it! I’d decided to tell Danny all of this once we were back in the city so what did it matter if he knew now?
As Danny continued to stand motionless with a blank look on his face, I realized I was shivering. In my haste to leave, I’d left our room in only my thin nightshirt. Not even slippers. This time when I brushed past Danny, he didn’t move to get in my way.
After pressing the button for the elevator, I turned to say, “I’ll be back at six. Your sister and cousin should still be sleeping so they won’t have to know I didn’t sleep in our room. For the wedding and reception, I’ll still be your fiancé. That was our deal. If you decide you don’t want me there, fine by me! I can catch a train back to the city.”
Thankfully, the hotel wasn’t at capacity. Mr. Houston, the Night Manager, looked like he wanted to ask, but he’d seen pretty much everything in his tenure at a hotel. He just shook his head and checked me into another room quickly to keep me from being seen in the foyer in just a nightshirt. The single room I dropped my suitcase in was… Well, it was everything you’d expect from a single hotel room… Dull, uninteresting and lonely.
********
True to my word, I was at the suite’s door at six. Danny was there to let me in and followed me to the bedroom. Once the door was closed he asked if we could talk.
“Sure,” I replied. “First, tell me if you still want me to pose as your fiancé today so I know what clothes I’ll need.”
“Yes. That is, if you still want to.”
“That was our deal, wasn’t it,” I said calmly. Before Danny could say anything, I continued in a business-like manner and tone of voice. Picking the suitcases I’d need, I placed them on the bed. “The wedding ceremony is set to start at three. You’re one of the groom’s best men so you’ll be expected to show up at least two hours early to help out. Just in case there’s a last-minute glitch. Tell Stan to pick us up at noon.”
“OK. Look, Olivia…”
I interrupted, still all business while getting what I needed from a suitcase. “I’m going to wash my face, change clothes and go downstairs for the buffet breakfast. Then I’ll need to shower and wash my hair. Makeup, hair and clothes after that. You can have the bathroom anytime before or after I need the mirror for my makeup.”
Taking the clothes I’d need, I shut the bathroom door. Through it, I heard Danny say, “Sooner or later, we need to talk.” I turned the water on in the sink and didn’t answer.
Dressed, I left the bathroom and passed by Danny without a word to go eat. I was piling buffet food on my plate when Danny appeared beside me. “I know you won’t walk away from food,” he joked, looking at the heap on my plate. “Can we finally talk?”
“Sure.”
“Wow. You can do passive aggression with the best.”
“Ohh, Danny… You should be very glad that ‘passive’ is part of that sentence!”
Danny played with the food on his plate while I ate. “I had a lot of time last night to think and you’re right. I am screwed up.”
I waited. Then, “Is this where you want me to disagree? Because I’m not. Danny, you are the most FUBAR’ed person I know. And I know quite a few prostitutes.”
“FUBAR?”
“Military acronym my dad uses. Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition.”
“OK. I’m FUBAR’ed. I… You’re right… I don’t trust girls. I’ve used excuses not to ask them out. No money… No time… I wanted to ask you out but…”
“Then why didn’t you?”
“Because I’m FUBAR’ed! And because…”
“What?”
Danny hesitated, searching for words before waving a hand at me, “Damn it! Look at you! You’re fucking gorgeous. You’re a ten and I’m at best a six… Why would you go out with a six?”
Danny exhaled and admitted, “No! I’m making more excuses and I need to stop. The real reason is, when you showed interest in me last week after months of just a smile and a few words on the staircase, all my defenses went up. You said you wanted something and…”
I waited for Danny to continue but when he continued to sit and stare at his plate, I said, “OK. Let’s put our cards on the table. I did want something. When we were back in the city I wanted you to solve a puzzle for me.
Danny’s head came up and he looked at me like I was the one who was crazy. “A puzzle? You want me to solve a puzzle? That’s it? That’s all you wanted?”
“That’s it.”
“No killing anyone? No robbing a bank?”
“Holy crap, Danny. What stupid books have you been reading? No, all I wanted was your help in solving a puzzle that’s had me stumped for a month or so.”
“Huh. A puzzle…” Danny said quietly, then threw up his arms in exasperation. “Why the hell didn’t you just say so? All this time I’ve had all these theories about what you needed my help with.”
“You wanted me to leave you alone during your exams, you stupid shit,” I replied angrily. “I didn’t know that you were so fucked up in the head that murdering someone while robbing a bank was on your list! You are one FUBAR’ed little nerd.”
“Maybe,” Danny said. “OK, yes I’m FUBAR’ed. But, you’re right. It’s time for me to really try to move on.”
********
In some ways, Danny knowing I was a call girl helped to ease the tension between us a bit. At least, it gave us something to talk about. We weren’t as comfortable around each other as we’d been yesterday – not by a long shot! – but at least, I could stand having him in the same room without wanting to rip his eyes out.
“So, let me get this straight,” Danny said over the sound of the hair dryer I was using on my hair. “You’ve been a call girl the entire time I’ve known you?”
“Yes.”
“So, all this time the reason I’ve never heard you walking above my apartment is because…”
“No. Not because I’ve been with clients,” I interrupted to correct his mistaken assumption. “I haven’t been in my apartment because I was living at home. I recently rented another, much smaller efficiency apartment my parents think is where I live in the city. Did you really think I could afford such a great apartment on an office temp’s pay? My mom sure wouldn’t.”
“So, you have two apartments. One you live in above mine and a small one your parents think you live in.”
“Correct.”
“But you’ve only been really living in the apartment above mine for a few weeks. Why have it then?”
“I needed a place to put my things. Clothes that would not pass parental examination.” I held out my arm, “My watch? That watch cost me four thousand dollars. It’s the only thing of my ‘Secret Identity’ I wear at home because my parents wouldn’t know it from a ten-dollar watch bought at a discount store. But, believe you me, my mom would know the cost of every single one of my dresses to the penny.”
“Four thousand dollars! For a watch?”
“I might be easy but I’m not cheap,” I smiled smugly as I repeated something Sandra had said to me once.
“So you’ve been lying for almost a year and…”
“Danny,” I shut off the hair blower and looked at him. “I know you have trust issues but the only thing I’ve ever lied to you about is what I do to make money. And, frankly, that wasn’t really a lie. It was just none of your damned business.”
Danny sat for a while as I brushed my hair. Then, hesitantly remarked, “You did lie to me last night. You said I was the first guy in almost a year and…”
“No,” I interrupted forcefully and pointed my hairbrush at him as I explained, “I did not lie. I said you were the first man to make love to me in almost a year. And you were! It’s completely different between what we did and what I do with a client. At least, I thought we making love! I didn’t know you were fucking me while wondering what it was going to cost you!”
“But, you go out and make love to men pretty much every day.”
“I don’t make love to clients! It’s just sex,” I said, throwing up my hands in exasperation because the asshole just didn’t get it! “There’s a world of difference between last night and just sex.”
I thought about what to say to try and explain, “When I’m with a client, it’s always up to me to satisfy him. I always have to think about his satisfaction, not mine. So when I’m with a client, I’m acting. I say all the right things. I do all the right things. I respond in all the right ways… But, I’m acting.”
I turned so I didn’t have to look at Danny, “Last night, I thought I was enjoying having a guy who thought about how to satisfy me. I sure as hell wasn’t acting. I might as well have been since you thought I was whoring to get something from you.”
Danny sat in thought as I gathered a handful of hair and directed the blower at the bottom end of the still damp strands.
“I’m sorry,” Danny finally said. “I really didn’t mean to imply…”
“Well, you did more than imply,” I accused when his voice faded away. Feeling my hair to see if it was dry, I turned off the blower and picked up my hairbrush. I looked at his reflection in the mirror and stated, “I’m not ashamed of what I do. Most of the time, it’s enjoyable even when I’m acting. But it’s not always enjoyable. That’s what makes me a whore. I have sex for money, not because I want to.
I looked away from his reflection and lowered my voice, “Last night was because I wanted to. And I still ended up feeling like a whore.”
I began to vigorously brush out my now dry hair. “Well,” I continued in a brisk voice. “Neither of us have to worry. We’ll get through the wedding. After that, we can go back to ignoring each other.”
********
“Wow…”
From Danny’s reaction, I knew I looked good. I’d just joined Danny in front of the hotel to wait for Stan to pick us up. Amber and Brie were off to one side. They looked everywhere but at me. After last night’s fiasco? Maybe they thought I’d kick their asses.
“I thought you said you were going to dress to fade into the background,” Danny observed while his eyes traveled up and down my body.
“It’s a black dress,” I replied. “I couldn’t find a more drab color. It doesn’t show cleavage and it’s below the knee. Any drabber and I’d have to wear burlap.”
“Hell,” Danny said. “You’d make burlap look good!”
I didn’t respond to Danny’s compliment. After last night, I didn’t give a shit about what he thought. I snapped open my sunglasses and ignored him. Just then Stan pulled up and we were delivered to the church. As we walked in, Danny looked down and said, “I thought you were going to wear flat shoes?”
I smiled as I saw the reason for me wearing heels. Carolyn the Bug was talking to other guests. I didn’t owe Danny a damned thing after last night, but one last bug-squashing would lift my spirits immensely. Waving and smiling politely in her direction, I muttered under my breath, “When there’s a bug that needs to be stepped on, spike heels are required.”
Leaving Danny’s side, I continued to wave and smile like seeing an old friend as I went to tower over The Bug. The poor dear was wearing flat sandals as part of her Maid of Honor’s ensemble. In four-inch heels, I was at least a foot taller. When I stood next to The Bug, she was literally and figuratively in my shadow.
I made it a point to stand next to The Bug as much as possible both before and after the ceremony. All the while I stole the spotlight from her, we were smiling and acting like we were newly found BFFs. The few times we had some privacy, though, the masks came off. Yeah, if looks could kill my head would have been mounted over The Bug’s fireplace mantle before the sun went down. Bless her heart…
The Bug didn’t come to the reception. For which I was both sad and glad. Glad I wouldn’t ruin my dress and sad I wouldn’t get to smash The Bug’s face into gooey cow poop. Ah, well… If Danny and I had to keep up the charade of being engaged, maybe I’d run into her, and perhaps over her, at a Fourth of July celebration.
The reception was held outside in Danny’s parent’s huge yard. Because of the soft dirt and lack of Bugs, I exchanged my spike heels for the flats I’d brought in my purse. I sat at a table on the edge of the festivities and faded as much as possible into the background.
I politely but firmly turned down Hannah when she wanted me in the family photos. Pointing out I wasn’t family yet, I kept up the lie and told Hannah that next year, she would be in my family wedding photos. In four or five months when Danny and I ‘broke up’, she’d be glad I wasn’t in her photos.
The reception went well. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. Danny was kept busy running errands and doing little chores under the direction of his mom. He sat with me when he could. I was polite and chatty to everyone who came to my table. To stay occupied I drank a bit too much champagne. I wasn’t sloppy drunk or anything but I was definitely feeling tipsy by the time we left.
That night, Danny and I had the suite to ourselves. Enough guests had left for their homes that Amber moved back into her room with Brie. Neither had been very comfortable around me today. They knew they’d fucked up and stuck me with a huge bill to pay for their party.
I had Danny move his things into the other bedroom. I could tell he was disappointed but he didn’t say anything when I told him, “I share hotel rooms with clients and friends. Right now, you’re neither of those.”
During the reception, I’d invited Danny’s family to have breakfast at the hotel’s buffet. I thought that his mom would appreciate the chance of not having to cook after all the hard work she’d put in the last few days. Besides, what was the cost of a few more meals charged to my account after all the other money I was billed for. It was hard to keep up the charade this morning. I was tired and just wanted to go home.
I must have been hugged four times by his mom before Stan drove us to the station for the train ride back to the city. Danny and I didn’t talk much once we’d said goodbye to his family. We were polite to each other but there wasn’t any of the easy banter we’d exchanged on the ride north. I passed the first hour by sipping bourbon from the mini-bar bottles I’d collected. Danny gave me a sour look as I finished my fourth and opened a fifth bottle.
“What’s the matter, Danny,” I asked. “Never seen a drunk whore?” I shotgunned the bottle and searched my handbag for another.
“I’m just wondering if I’ll have to carry you off the train along with your luggage.”
“Ahh, don’t be a party-pooper! Have a few,” I suggested pointing at my bag. “Let’s toast to the end of this shitty weekend. Hey! I’ve still got that Sex Survey! You can find out all those naughty little details about my life as a whore that I know you’re just dying to ask.”
Danny became suddenly interested in what was outside the window. “Be quiet, Olivia. This isn’t you. It’s the alcohol talking.”
“Oh, it’s me alright. Every single inch of me that you fucked while wondering what I was going to ask you to do as payment.” I leaned back and smiled as I opened another bottle. I was taking delicious pleasure in how uncomfortable Danny was. “Yeah, I might be a whore but at least I’m an honest whore. The men I fuck know upfront how much I charge. I guess I just failed to tell you that I was charging by the hour,” I told Danny and sipped more bourbon.
Danny continued to stare out the window and said, “I said I was sorry for implying you were trying to influence me.”
“With your pussy…” I tacked on helpfully to finish his sentence.
“Aww, c’mon, Danny. Still can’t say it? Hey! Let’s let bygones be bygones… You don’t wanna take the survey so let’s play a game instead.”
“A game?”
“Sure. All you have to do is answer one question to win. Am I wearing panties? That’s it. Is the whore wearing panties? That’s the question.”
“What?! OK, that’s it. Enough booze for you,” Danny declared and reached over to snatch my handbag away from my side.
I would have protested but six or seven shots of bourbon after a greasy breakfast combined with the constant motion of the train was affecting me and not in a good way. I didn’t feel great so I settled on sulking. Over the next fifteen minutes, I felt sicker and sicker. Then… I managed to stumble to my feet and Danny was there to help open the doors between cars. I got to the bathroom in time to throw up in the toilet.
Danny left and returned with a bottle of water. After pouring some water over a handful of paper towels, he gave me the bottle with orders to rinse and spit. After wiping my face off, he helped me back to my seat. I sprawled out on the seat with my feet sticking out into the aisle and concentrated on not throwing up again. I must have dozed off because we were ten minutes from our stop when Danny began slapping my knee to rouse me.
Once I was awake and seemed able to concentrate, Danny spoke up, “I’m going to say something that will sound bad but please wait until I’ve finished before you blow up. OK?”
I didn’t like the sound of that but gave a conditional, “No promises but I’ll try.”
Danny took a deep breath and began an obviously rehearsed speech, “I want to thank you for all you did this weekend. Mom couldn’t stop talking about you. Under the circumstances, you were very nice to continue being my fake fiancé until we left…”
“So,” Danny held his hands out towards me as if to ward off an attack, “I want to pay you… Wait!” The narrowing of my eyes and the tensing of my muscles must have warned Danny.
Danny continued only after I put a hand to my pounding head and relaxed back into my seat. “I want to pay you back for the huge bill Amber and Brie ran up on the room’s account. That’s all! Everything else you did was only because you wanted to and I won’t insult you by offering you money for that. But Amber and Brie are my family and you don’t deserve to have to pay for their stupidity.”
I considered and nodded. Turning to look out the window at houses going by, I said, “That’s fair, but cash only. I don’t take checks.”
“That’s it! Stop it,” Danny’s words burst out in a loud, angry tirade. “And don’t you dare say, ‘Stop what…’! You know exactly how you’re acting. You’re either teasing me or treating me like a stranger or… Danny lowered his voice so it didn’t carry the length of our train car. “… or like a client.”
Danny’s temper didn’t disappear but his voice remained quiet. “And you know damned well I don’t have money so I’ll solve your stupid puzzle! If it takes me all fucking Summer, I’ll solve your damned puzzle. At least, that’s one way I can pay you back for all you’ve done!”
I considered and I had been a little hard on the guy. Passive aggressiveness seemed to be my default setting when I didn’t know how else to act. “OK… That seems fair. I’ll try to act more natural around you and when you solve my puzzle we can try being friendly when we see each other on the stairs again.”
“That’s fair. So, tell me about your puzzle. Is it mathematical or more like, ‘Where’s Waldo’?”
“Probably a little of both,” I replied. “When we get back, give me an hour to unpack and then come upstairs and I’ll show it to you.”
Danny nodded and if the tension between us didn’t completely disappear, at least it dropped to a bearable level. One hour to the minute after Danny lugged my suitcases inside my apartment he was knocking on the door.
After getting us soft drinks and chips to munch on, I started to explain what had happened that day in Tim’s office.
“Do you meet many, umm… You know, at their office?“
“Clients,” I said. “Just call them clients. And, no, not as many as when I started. It’s usually at a hotel now. Let me show you the puzzle and then I’ll answer all the questions you’re dying to ask about my life as a call girl.”
I laid out all the papers Tim had given me on my coffee table and tried to describe what happened in Tim’s office that day as well as every word Tim had said. Danny sat quietly until the end, then started leafing through the papers. He asked a few questions to clarify what Tim had said before asking, “And this is all he gave you?”
“Well, no,” I said and retrieved the letter that was still in the book. “He gave me this to put in the mail.”
“Damn, a Federal District Attorney… Why didn’t you mail it?”
“Don’t you think a Federal DA might be curious how a dead guy is sending him mail? My fingerprints are all over that envelope and so are yours now. You go mail it!”
“Nooo, I think we can do that later in an envelope we only touch with gloved hands,” Danny said and put the letter aside. “Damn! A Fed, which means the FBI… Are you sure you don’t want me to just rob a bank?”
“Yeah… Money from a safe… That brings me to the last thing Tim gave me,” I said. I didn’t think it had anything to do with our puzzle but it was best to have full disclosure. I’d bought a Cornmeal tin that matched the colors of my other tins as a place for Tim’s money to rest in. I retrieved it from the kitchen. Opening it, I poured the pile of bills onto the table in front of Danny.
“Holy fuck!” My nerd did the math quicker than I had and all in his head. “That’s two hundred thousand dollars!”
I nodded. “Now do you see why I didn’t care about the money I spent for the wedding trip?”
“So, you’ve spent some. How much did he give you in total?”
“Oh, no… That’s what he gave me. I haven’t spent any of it. I keep my spending money in the Flour tin.”
“Spending money…” Danny said in a small voice and then shook his head. “Not my business!”
Not his business but I knew he was dying to ask how much spending money I kept in the Flour tin.
Truth time? I had no idea how much was in the Flour tin. I put tip money in and took money out when needed. The money Marla deposited (My official wages I’d have to report on my taxes) in my bank account was more than enough to cover the rent and utilities on my two apartments and my bank balance was still growing nicely every month. The level of hundreds and fifties kept rising in the Flour tin which was why I’d had to move Tim’s money to the Cornmeal tin.
Danny sat in thought and then asked about the ten pages in German.
“They’re exactly like I told you,” I repeated. “Complete gibberish. It’s like Tim took words at random from a German dictionary.”
Danny didn’t ask about the twenty pages in English. He’d read them himself.
“This reminds me of code-breaking and ciphers during the First World War. There would be a book that was common to many people. Something like The Bible and… Nooo… There is no other book. We have the book here,” Danny said, tapping the pages written in English and German.
Danny began matching numbers from the page with columns to letters on the other pages. Then he started counting lines and letters on those lines… He finally sat back and sighed that this wasn’t working. For many minutes he sat and just looked at the pages on my coffee table.
Leaning forwards, he tapped the page with the columns of numbers, letters and symbols with a finger and said. “This is the key. This unlocks something. These pages in English and German are to tell us what and where the lock is.” He handed me one of the pages written in German. “Is there a city, or State or country listed? Anything geographical? An island? Something?”
I skimmed the page and found nothing.
“OK. Are there any words on there that are English or are the same in English as they are in German. Early ciphers would disguise keywords in a longer message.”
“How do you know about this stuff?”
“I’m a nerd. I read,” Danny said in a dry voice.
I skimmed the page again and, “There might be two. Frau Berger… Berger is a name so it would be the same in English and German. And, Fluffy? Another name? It’s capitalized like a name. It’s the only other capitalized word on the page. The word behind it means steel in German so I don’t think that ‘Fluffy steel’ can mean anything.”
One by one, Danny had me read each German page for words that were English or the same in German and English. On each page, I found two. A name and another capitalized word that could be a name but that by itself meant nothing.
Danny sat in thought while I read and called out what I’d found. He seemed to grow more excited but about what? He handed me the first English page with instructions to look for geographical references. I found only one. St. Tropez.
“But isn’t that a person? Saint Tropez? The patron saint of something?”
“It might be but it’s also an island in the Caribbean.”
“How the hell do you know that?”
“I’m a nerd. I read,” Danny repeated absentmindedly. “OK, that’s page four and there is another page four… Here.”
Danny handed that page to me and had me look for geographical references. I found two. He shook his head and leaned his head down into his hands. “There shouldn’t be three geographical places. Only one… I’m missing something…” was all he muttered and sat with his eyes closed for a minute.
“One page has only one geographical reference. If that is the ‘Where’, then the other page should hold the ‘What’.” Danny pointed to the sheet still in my hand. “What is that page about? The topic?”
I’d read and reread these so often I answered quickly. “It reads like part of a deposition of a bank manager concerning a dispute between two banks.” I read off the names of the banks and Danny suddenly jumped to his feet and shouted, “Eureka!”
“The Sci-Fi TV show?”
Danny looked at me as if I were the one crazy and shouting nonsense. “Olivia, you have got to start reading more than tips about makeup in magazines. I need a computer.”
“I’ve got a laptop.”
“Did you buy it new?” I nodded. “We can’t use that. It has an IP address that can be traced to you. If anyone is waiting to see if someone else starts poking around on the internet for whatever we’re searching for… Yeah, it sounds paranoid but we’ll use my computer.”
“I like paranoid. Paranoid is good. I can do paranoid all day,” I told Danny as we went downstairs to his apartment. “But, won’t your computer lead back to you?”
Danny shook his head. “It’s third- and fourth-hand junk I cobbled together. Nothing with my name associated with it.”
In Danny’s apartment, while he started up his computer, I asked, “But if you’re so worried about secrecy, can’t someone track your internet address?”
Danny shook his head again and pointed to something mounted beside his window. It looked like a large salad bowl. “What is it?” I asked.
“It used to be a parabolic microphone but I modified it to pick up radio frequencies. Look where it’s pointed but don’t touch it.”
“It’s pointed at the Coffee Clutch down the street.”
“Exactly,” Danny said while typing. “I don’t have the internet so I hijack the Coffee Clutch wi-fi. Saves me money every month. Assuming anyone does attempt to trace what I’m doing, all they’ll find is a big dead end at a place where a couple of hundred customers a day use the same router.”
I looked at the salad bowl with more respect. “Well, aren’t you just the nerdiest nerd?”
“OK. I need to do some research. Just make yourself comfortable,” he said with a wave at his couch. I sat on just the edge, not wanting to lean back into what looked like a sticky stain half covered by a towel.
“Jeez, Danny. You live like a pig!”
Danny shot me a dark look. “Well, I’m sorry, but not everyone has two hundred thousand dollars in their kitchen!”
“You sure are touchy about money… OK, OK, I’ll shut up about money, but… Ugghh… I can’t sit on this couch without thinking about catching cooties,” I said and stood up.
“You’re a call girl and you’re worried about cooties,” Danny asked absentmindedly while typing.
“I don’t like bugs,” I replied. “My being a call girl doesn’t mean I don’t have hygiene standards and your furniture is definitely sub-standard.” After dusting off the ass of my jeans with my hands, I went to the small sink in the kitchen to wash them off. At least, Danny wasn’t a complete slob. The kitchen was clean and there was no food lying about to attract bugs. But that couch? It had to go!
“Alright,” Danny said after I’d paced around his apartment for several minutes. I wasn’t exactly snooping but… “There is one bank in St. Tropez that is affiliated with a bank named on the deposition page.”
I stood behind Danny as he typed and there appeared on the screen a menu page for the bank. “I think we have the location of the treasure,” Danny muttered under his breath. “Now we just have to get past the monsters guarding it.”
“Really, Danny? You played Dungeons & Dragons?” I switched to my breathy, sexy voice, ‘Ohh, Danny! The way you roll those dice makes me so hot!’ Said no girl, EVER!”
“Shut up… I happen to enjoy role-playing games,” Danny replied while reading the Menu. “I think we should look under ACCOUNTS.” Danny clicked and a new screen appeared that had nothing but a blinking cursor and a series of blank boxes. In a rapid, excited voice he yelled, “YES! The page with the list of columns. This is from page four. Read off the first sequence on the fourth entry down.”
I did and Danny carefully typed and filled in the boxes. He clicked ENTER and we waited… And waited…
“That’s a slow computer you’ve got.”
Finally, the screen blinked back on with a question… What is the name of your favorite Aunt?
“YES! YES! YES,” Danny screamed at his computer screen. Then he pointed at the papers in my hand. “The fourth German page. There is a name. What is it?”
I found it and spelled it out as Danny typed and then clicked ENTER. Another long wait and then… What is your Mother’s favorite color?
“A color! Is there a color mentioned on the fourth page? In German or English.”
“Blau… That’s blue in English.”
“OK, the fact that it is in German must mean we enter the German word.” Danny did and hit ENTER again…
What was your favorite pet’s name? I didn’t wait for instructions and read aloud, “Smirnoff. It’s the only capitalized word other than the name you used already, but who would name a pet ‘Smirnoff’?”
“They can name the damned pet King Tut if they want,” Danny mumbled as he typed and clicked ENTER again. This time the wait stretched on… And on… Then another screen appeared with only a series of boxes and a blinking cursor.
I didn’t need instructions and I read off the second series on the fourth row down and…
WELCOME MR. RASHID…
Under the name was listed Commands Mr. Rashid could choose from. I didn’t get a good look before Danny burst up from his chair, pointed his index fingers at the screen and made shooting motions while screaming, “YES! I OWNED YOUR ASS, BITCH!!”
Danny turned to give me a high five and then hugged the stuffins outta me. “I did it!” he screamed into my face before releasing me to sit down again. Danny skimmed the list of commands and excitedly pointed at, “Account Balance… I think we should go here first. Before we can do anything, we need to know if there is anything in the account.”
I agreed and Danny clicked on the Command for Account Balance. This time the screen changed quickly.
56,000,000.00 USD
“That’s a lot of zeros,” I breathed out. “But what’s a USD?”
“United States Dollars,” Danny said reverently, sitting back in his seat to look at me. “Olivia. You’re a millionaire!”
