They meet
The two walked out of the courthouse together. “Thank you for the help with my father’s estate,” she said.
“No problem,” he said, “Probate isn’t something you do every day.”
“Stop by my place?” she asked. “We can stream a movie and I’ve got an unopened bottle of champagne.”
“Sounds good,” he said.
They were watching the movie when she asked, “Why did you bother to help me? You didn’t know my father.”
“Well, here’s the story. My nephew was traveling in Europe with his college class. His classmate, now his wife, had some sort of passport problem when they were crossing Luxembourg. So he went with her to the American Embassy to help straighten things out. Nothing technical, just moral support. Later she said that this little trip, where he was there for her, was the time she fell in love with him.”
“Nice story, but so what?”
“When you asked me for help, I just thought that here was my chance to have a beautiful woman fall in love with me, too.”
She paused. She looked at nothing in particular. Then she smiled, took his arm, and looked up at him. She said to him, “Your plan is working. It’s working very well.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” he said. And they kissed. And went back to the movie.
After a while, she growled, “I mean it’s working really, really well.” They kissed again. And returned to the movie.
Finally, she gripped his arm. “Do have me, darling,” she said quietly.
He turned and looked at her. She looked at him, smiled, and nodded yes enthusiastically.
“Let’s go,” he said, and pulled her up.
“Let’s take the couch,” she said, “The bedroom’s a mess.”
He took her hand and they headed for the bedroom.
The Welcome Gift
The evening went well. Finally, she straddled him, and slowly eased herself down.
“I’m going to make you cum, lover.”
“No, you’re not.” He understood the game.
“Hmm…” She thought for a moment. “Did I ever tell you about my job as a welcome gift? I was still in my twenties. I saw an ad from the Sultan. He was recruiting for his harem. I applied, I showed up for the interview naked, and got the job.”
“Hmm. The Sultan of what?”
She thought for a moment. “That’s right.”
“What’s right?”
“Yes. The Sultan of Wut.”
“There were about twenty of us,” she continued. “I wasn’t the Sultan’s favorite, but I was the only one with any social skills. I also was the only one with D-cups. Anyway, after I was there a few months, the Sultan got wind that the prime minister was plotting to overthrow him. And the Sultan assigned me to find out what was going on.
So I showed up in the prime minister’s office wearing a see-through blouse. After I finished with the prime minister, he abandoned his plans to overthrow the Sultan. In fact, after I was done with him,” she giggled, “the prime minister could barely remember his own name.”
Am I going somewhere with this? —she thought to herself.
“Are you going somewhere with this?” he said out loud.
“Hmm, yes.. After I handled the prime minister, the Sultan made me his official Welcome Gift. Dignitaries would get off the plane, and I would be standing there. Smiling. And wearing nothing.
“My point is this. Over my time as a Welcome Gift, I had a few women. But I had many, many men. I had rich men, powerful men, handsome men. A lot of them carried some impressive cock. But of all the male armament I have seen, and touched, and kissed, and fucked, yours…”
She leaned forward and whispered in his ear. “Yours is the most,” she paused, “the most beautiful.”
His defenses fell away. He began to cum. He came for an hour and a half and surrendered buckets of his cum (or so it seemed to him).
She giggled. “I made you cum. Wasn’t that a great story?” She paused. “Except for the part about your beautiful cock. No story there, lover.” She leaned forward again and whispered. “That part is true.” Softly into his ear, she drew out the oo in “true.” “A hundred percent true.”
Helpless, he came again. She giggled again. “Two shots in a few moments, lover. Am I ever impressed? Now let’s see how much more goo I can coax out of your friend down there.
She moved her hips in a small circle. He moaned.
“Once upon a time,” she began, “a beautiful, naked princess…”
The Blouses
She walked into Bargain Barn. She saw him looking at the second -hand blouses.
Oh, my God, she thought to herself, I might have a cross dresser and I didn’t pick up on that. She walked to the blouses, where he was looking at the mediums. She crossed her arms and said drily, “Wouldn’t you look better in an extra large?”
In answer, he held the blouse to her and said, “You’re more of a medium, right?”
“Yeah, and?”
“When we’re together, I want you. I want you really bad.”
“Yeah, and?”
“I want you bad enough to reach for your blouse and rip it off you.”
“Uh, yeah, and?”
“But if I did that every time I felt like it, it would get kind of expensive. I mean, ripping a new blouse off you and buying you another one.”
“Yeah, and?”
“I figured that I’d buy a bunch of used blouses. That way, it wouldn’t make any difference when I ripped one, and it wouldn’t cost much to replace.”
She looked at the ceiling. “Okay. So how many are you buying?”
“Fifteen.”
“So you’re buying fifteen used blouses so that I can wear them so you can rip them off me.”
“Yeah,” he said, smiling as though he just invented the light bulb.
Men, she thought. She rolled her eyes. “Okay, Mr. Passion, I will wear one blouse this weekend. If you can rip it off me and keep a straight face while you’re doing it, I will wear the rest of them. Deal?”
“Deal.”
The next day he went back to Bargain Barn and returned the other fourteen blouses. He was still laughing, but he returned them.
That evening, she looked at herself in the mirror. He wanted me, she thought, and, really, I wanted him. She looked at the used blouse, now hanging in the closet.
He showed up the day after the second trip to Bargain Barn, this time carrying flowers and a big box of chocolates. He noticed she was wearing the used blouse that he could not, with a straight face, rip off her. He commented on it.
“Yeah, lover, same blouse. But since you left I’m having trouble taking it off. I checked around. The manufacturer’s website says it can be removed only by a guy with a decent sense of humor.”
He paused and kept a straight face. “Why does a fireman wear red suspenders?”
“I dunno. Why?”
“To keep his pants up.”
She just looked at him. “Okay, Joe Miller. Rip this blouse.” He stared in her eyes, then at her chest. He began to breathe heavily. So did she. He unbuttoned one button. With one hand he took one side of her blouse, and with his other he took the other side. He pulled with all his might. The blouse, destroyed, fell to the floor. She was wearing no bra. They kissed and fucked, hard.
She was out of breath. “Now go back,” she panted, “and buy me the other fourteen.”
The Garden
The Petterson’s had a lush garden, away from the view of neighbors and the street. This weekend, while they were away, they let her play in it. She set up a bed, under a canopy, and told him to come over.
When he arrived in the garden, she was standing, facing him, wearing a blue bikini bottom and nothing else.
“I want a massage,” she told him firmly. She was going to be the one in charge.
She lay down on the bed on her stomach. “Start,” she commanded.
He sat down next to her and tried his best to remember a book he had read as a college sophomore, The Bliss of Sensual Massage, which he remembered as Sensual Massage for Dunces. He did his best to think of what he would enjoy, and then did the same for her. He stroked her arms and neck, her upper back, lower back, and then her legs. He hesitated at the bikini bottom, but finally undid both fasteners and massaged her rear.
He went through the same massage a second time, and that finished her back. She did not turn over. In fact, her breathing was soft and regular. In fact, she was asleep.
“Uh, Honey?” He said quietly. No response.
His dominatrix started to snore.
He sat back and admired her softness and curves. He daydreamed about the things he could do. After a half hour or so, she began to awaken. Her eyelids fluttered.
The first thing she heard was a whisper in her ear. “Did you have a naughty dream?” he asked quietly. “Naughty ones are the best kind.” She turned her head and looked at him. “I had a very naughty daydream,” he added.
“I daydreamed that I stroked your soft and warm and wonderful breasts,” he said, as his hand stroked her breast.
“And that I felt your nipples until they became hard and thrust outward, longing to be kissed.” At this, his fingertips massaged her nipples, which instantly grew to meet his touch. She moaned.
His hand moved to her rear. “And then I stroked your ample bottom, to let you know where my real passion lies.”
“My idle daydream continued. Gently, I massaged your welcome.” She raised her leg and exposed herself. She was already moist. “And then I made you very wet,” which he proceeded to do.
“And that was the end of my daydream,” he said, and withdrew his hand.
She was dripping wet. Her loins were burning. Her eyes grew wide.
Not looking at him, she said, “Bastard. Fuck me.”
“Say please, my mistress.”
“What?”
“Say please.”
“You will fuck me, please, you bastard.”
That will do,” he replied. “Roll over.”
The love potion
She got the love potion from Hexe Lilith, the local witch. Lilith had a little shop with a wide selection. One small blue bottle was labeled simply, “Virtual.”
“What does that one do?” She asked.
“It melds two people. You and he will become one,” Lilith replied.
“You had me on ‘melds,’” she said. She bought three batches.
To see what it would do, she drank one bottle before bed. It did not seem to do anything.
Well, I got scammed, she thought.
When she arrived at work the next morning, she blew her nose and tossed the tissue in the wastebasket next to the desk of her secretary, Mavis.
She walked back in her office. From her desk she could still see Mavis. A few minutes later Tom from accounting showed up and asked for the pro forma statements for the current quarter.
Mavis said, very matter-of-factly, “Fine, but let me see your cock first.”
“Okay,” said Tom, “Nice weather we’re having, eh?” Tom unzipped his pants, dropped his underwear, and there he was. Mavis said, “That’s nice enough, but rub it out a little for me, will you?”
“Need a little help, here,” said Tom. So Mavis unbuttoned her blouse, took off her bra, and draped them on her lap. She stuck out her chest and said, “Two B-cups, at your service.” Tom stroked himself until he was hard.
Mavis said, “Tom, you do the accounting department proud. That one is very, very nice. Come around back here.” Tom, with his pants still around his ankles, waddled around the desk. Mavis planted a big kiss on his member. Tom said thanks, carefully pulled up his underwear and trousers, took the pro forma statements, and walked away. His bulge still showed. Mavis put her bra and blouse back on, and answered the phone.
Looking at Mavis and Tom, she sat at her desk. She watched all this, thinking that it was no big deal that two company employees exposed themselves to each other during work hours in the middle of the office.
Similar events continued. Returning from lunch, she got in the elevator with about six or seven other people. The door closed and after a few seconds the men and women start looking at each other. The elevator got to the third floor, and the door opened. John, next to the elevator control panel, shouted,”Third floor! Human Resources and Quality Control! Everybody take off your clothes!”
And that’s what people did. She watched quietly while the others disrobed. She got off the elevator, fully clothed, with three naked people from Human Resources. By now everybody still on the elevator was wearing only what nature gave them.
She started walking away. The other three then realized that they were wearing nothing, but their clothes were still on the elevator, and by now the elevator was on some other floor. They looked around quickly and hurried silently into the bathrooms. She sauntered away. She didn’t know what happened after that, but she knew something in the office was topsy-turvy.
When she got back to her office, she phoned Hexe Lilith.
“Lilith, what the hell? Today I get to work and I find myself in a Brazilian love hotel.” She described the two incidents. She mentioned the bottle she drank the night before.
“Well, dear, the potion lets your body make a pheromone. Most of the time, you can’t smell yourself, so the potion has almost no effect on you. But it has loads of effect on the people near you. The potion comes out your saliva, your sweat, your tears, your love juices way down there, everything you excrete.”
“Ugh. My stool?”
“No, thankfully. Your small intestine takes care of that.”
“Hmm… I excrete mucous.”
“Yep.”
“And some of the potion was still sloshing around inside me this morning.”
“Yep.”
“So now I have aphrodisiac snot?”
“Yep.”
“And that explains Mavis and Tom. And the stuff is in my sweat.”
“Yep.”
“And that explains the elevator.”
“You’re a quick learn, dear. Your lover is one lucky guy.”
It was Saturday night, and the two lovers were naked on the bed. She told him the stories of Mavis and the elevator. She recounted her phone call with Hexe Lilith. He laughed at all of it.
They held up the small blue bottles and clinked them together. “To love,” she said. “Yes. To love,” he replied. They both drank it, and kissed, and each breathed deeply the new aroma of their lover. Both felt their skin tingle. Both felt their nipples beg for attention.
Almost immediately, he grew hard. Almost immediately, her juices dripped from her crotch, and her scent welcomed him in.
He could not endure even a few moments of foreplay. She wanted him, and she wanted him now. She held him to her vagina, and he pushed forward.
And that is when it started. He felt her penis enter his vagina.
Her what is doing what to my what? he thought to himself. “Honey, can you feel that?”
“Well, I just feel my penis going in your vagina.” She paused. “Wait! What?”
The two looked at each other.
“Did Lilith tell you about this?” he asked.
“Not exactly, darling, but she did say that we would meld and become one. Anyway, I feel good with the equipment I already have plus all the stuff that little bottle just gave me. Feel good to you?”
“Well, yeah. It’s like having a virtual vagina.”
Then it all fell into place. Virtual. “Oh,” she said, “or like a virtual penis.”
He began to pump slowly. So did she. She could feel her cock throbbing within him, and he could feel her. She moaned with pleasure. So did he.
“Well, now I understand the big deal about hard-ons,” she said, “I feel like king of the universe!”
“Now I understand that I have something that can make a man very, very happy. And why that is worth protecting from just any guy.” Then, in the middle of sex, he added solemnly, “And now I understand why some guys will do what they do to get at what I have. I don’t agree with it. But now I understand it.”
“Welcome to the club, lover,” she said, and gave him a big, wet, open-mouthed kiss, which he returned and began pumping her faster and faster in real life. She felt the same, and began pumping him virtually.
The tension slowly built within him. Suddenly his head was thrown back and he saw a million stars. He saw fireworks. His skin tingled. He shuddered. He felt outside the control of his own body. He felt like he had turned to jelly and he collapsed into her arms. Her arms held him close.
His vagina became warmer and wetter. Suddenly her head felt like it exploded. She began to ejaculate. Her hips rose and fell quickly and involuntarily. She felt the orgasm in her hips. She felt it around her penis. During the orgasm, with her pumping wildly, he felt like he was in a paint mixer.
They were both exhausted and sweaty.
“Am I really that soft and warm?” she asked.
“Oh yeah. Was I soft and warm enough to make you happy?” he asked.
“Yes, lover. You were wonderful. Did you see stars?”
“I think I saw the entire Milky Way galaxy,” he replied, “and I visited each of the stars. And they were each as beautiful as you.” As he said “you” he touched the tip of her nose with his finger.
“Be careful where you put that,” she said. “I got snot that’s hot to trot.”
“Those were fun stories about your office,” he said. “And you know what else is fun to think about?”
“Tell me, lover.”
“Round two.” He said. “The part of us that is really me has to wait a while. But women don’t have to wait. My virtual vagina is ready to go.”
They were next to each other, lying down. He reached for her and began to massage her clitoris. She moaned.
“That makes me happy, lover,” she said, “but what about you?”
“Good point,” he said. He looked down at himself and saw nothing but the usual. “Try rubbing your hand around until I feel something.” She stroked his penis. “No, nothing there,” he said, “he still has to wait.” She fondled his testicles. “Feels nice, but that’s not it.”
Then she moved her hand around in his pubic hair just above his penis. That did it. “Oh, yeah,” he said. “That’s my clitoris.” The two happily stroked each other. Gradually their minds merged and their tension grew stronger. In their simultaneous single orgasm, each of them saw one resplendent image of red and purple fireworks under a sky of white and blue stars. The fireworks dissolved into a gigantic wave that swamped both lovers. Their bodies shook and their skin tingled again.
They laughed. They took a shower together and laughed some more.
He and she laid next to each other and dozed off for the night. When she awakened, she discovered that she was her penis, strong and erect. Around her were stars and the universe. She struggled to cum, but she could not. In the distance she saw his vagina, warm and moist and welcoming and waiting. She flew across the galaxies until she met him. She abandoned all inhibitions. She dived into him and pumped and pumped. Then she gave him rivers and lakes and glorious oceans of cum. Her orgasm lasted for days.
Then she woke up, for real. He was already awake and looking at her, smiling.
“I had a wet dream where I was my penis,” she said to him, giggling.
“I had a dream where I became pregnant by you,” he replied.
By Sunday evening, the potion wore off. “A wonderful adventure, lover,” she said, “Next time, I’ll grab a friend.”
“Not for me, darling. Not for me.”
“I will cure you of that bit of nonsense,” she said, “and darling, you will love the cure.”
The cure
It was his birthday. He lay there, nude, spread eagled, handcuffed to the four posts of the bed.
“You are going to feel so good, baby,” she said. She was naked, except for her panties, which she took off while he watched. She wrapped them into a ball.
“Open wide, lover,” she said, and stuffed the ball into his mouth as far as it could go. The ball was moist.
“Now close as far as you can,” she said. She got a roll of tape from under the bed, and taped over his mouth.
“Now watch closely,” she said. She kneeled on the bed next to him and spread her legs.
She was dripping from her vagina. “You’re already tasting me. Now you’re going to breathe me, too. You’re going to find out how wonderful is my aroma.” With two fingers she reached into her vagina. She pulled out a cloth mask, sopping wet. She took the two loops and strung them over his ears.
She adjusted the mask over his chin and nose. The mask felt wet and warm against his face.
“Now take a deep breath.” He did so. He closed his eyes, thrust his head back, and moaned as the intoxicating aroma gave him a partial erection.
“Sweetheart, take a few more deep breaths. I want you closer to a nice hard-on.”
She reached under the bed again and pulled out a black mask. She looped the elastic band over his head and covered his eyes. His nearly full erection twitched repeatedly.
“‘Kah,” he moaned.
“You will cum all in good time, darling, all in good time. First let me tell you about your birthday present.” She called to someone. He felt a small breeze, meaning the door had opened. He heard light footsteps across the floor, and one corner of the bed moved.
“Two women, lover. Two women all over your body. With their hands and their lips. You’re going to taste me, you’re going to breathe me, and the only thing you’re going to feel is two tongues and four hands all over your cock and nipples.
“Now for introductions. I have a friend whom we will call Carol. Carol has been begging me for you. Carol has a face and a body that Alberto Vargas would enjoy painting. Rabelais would write bawdy poems about her. There is this French sculpture called, Woman Bitten by a Serpent. Have you ever seen it?”
He shook his head no.
“Well, it really ought to be called Girl with Big Boobs after an Orgasm. You don’t care about the serpent, just the woman’s face and figure. Anyway, that is a picture of Carol.”
“‘Oree’?” He asked, heavily muffled by the panties.
“No, no story this time. Carol is real, lover, and she is the real deal. Carol can touch her chin with her tongue. And she wants to lick your nipples. She wants to suck your tender cock.
I have been thinking about your birthday for a long while, and when I do that, I am always turning myself on. So I decided to join in. Carol and me, all over you. Like I said, you are going to feel so good. How about that, darling?” He did not respond.
“There is a catch, Mr. Monogamous. To get all of that special lovin’, you have to agree. I realize your mouth is full. So all you have to do is nod your head yes.”
He was quiet for a moment. Then he shook his head no.
“Wrong way, honey. Just move your head up and down.”
He shook his head no.
There was an edge on her voice this time.”Third time’s a charm, Sweetie. Just shake your head yes.”
He shook his head no.
Disappointed, she turned to Carol and shrugged her shoulders. Carol left. From the light breezes, he could feel the bedroom door opening and closing.
Livid, she turned on him. “Okay, Mister No, explain yourself. I only spent three months of my life arranging something for your birthday that would take you around the world, and then you come along and say Uh-uh. She pulled off the mask without paying much attention to whether the loops hurt his ears. She pulled off the tape, slowly and painfully. She left her panties in his mouth; he pushed them out.
“Now, what the hell?” She asked, still livid.
“I love you. I am a one-woman man. You are my woman. Just you. Thanks for all you want to do. But I want only you.”
She was silent. And motionless. Then she leaned forward, grabbed his head with both hands, and whispered, very urgently, into his ear, ‘’Marry me! Marry me right now! Marry me,” she paused, “or I’ll kill you.”
“Uh, okay.” He said.
She removed the mask over his eyes, carefully. He looked at her and smiled. She smiled back. She stroked him to stiffness, and mounted him. He came magnificently. They laughed.
And he and she lived happily ever after.